The Free Associator

The Philadelphia Syndicate is a collection of writers, businesses, artists, musicians, and activists based in Philadelphia, with connections to associates around the world via the internet. This publication is produced by members of the Syndicate's private online discussion forum for the purpose of giving exposure to the organization's thinkers to the public.

Friday, February 04, 2005

You can't make this stuff up

 

I have a pseudo-routine for Friday lunch – going to the Pat Conway’s Irish Pub located downstairs in my building (42nd and Madison). I use this time to eat good food, as opposed to my normal lunch fair crap and to catch up on some local news in either the NY Post or the NY Daily News. I have no real preference for one over the other.

Invariably I come across an article that is either shockingly stupid or right on point. Every Friday I am going to try to post my big finding. So today from the Post comes -

Lawyers Gone Wacky

I won’t re-print the entire article but essentially the insane posse of anti-SUV morons has co-opted a number of the states’ attorneys general (Connecticut, Florida, Iowa and Vermont) to use government tax dollars to convince young drivers to drive safely in their SUVs.

Their plan is simple – create a giant cross bred Muppet/SUV cleverly named “esuvee” (that is not a joke) to teach kids to drive their SUVs in a safe manner. This may be one of the stupidest ideas I have heard in days. What self respecting teenager wouldn’t laugh their ass off at this? As if teenagers already didn’t know that cornering on a back road at 100 miles an hour in an SUV may cause it to flip. The problem is not that they don’t understand physics, they do, at least instinctively if not via equations. The real problem is that THEY ARE TEENAGERS AND DO NOT FEAR DEATH. A big Muppet will not change this, even if the Muppet cost 30 million dollars.

And if this is aimed at younger people who may possibly be influenced by a Sweetums Muppet (“Jack not Name! Jack job!") morphed into SUV form, it might be prudent to take into account that they are probably not old enough to drive and certainly are not old enough to understand the effects of improper loading and low tire pressure.

-Greg


2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

SUVs suck ass "greg". The only morons are the ones driving them.

8:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

At this point, these things don't really surprise me. Have I been numbed by all the past gov't idiocies?

1:12 PM  

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